Before you react negatively to that title, allow me to tell you how I interpret that word, because I’ve thought about it a great deal and I’m pleased to report that it no longer evokes the negative charge that it’s held for me for most of my life.
Just the other day, a man who’s quite close to me called me by that word, and I think I can safely say that he thought he was insulting me or criticizing me. Imagine his shock when I reacted by saying, “Thank you! What a revelation!”
He didn’t quite know what to make of it — but I sure did, because, now that I’ve learned to love myself and now that I’ve become a thinker on my own, the way I react to being called a bitch is not too serious anymore, it’s laced with a sense of humor, rather than a negative sensitivity.
To me, a bitch is not someone who has an abrasive disposition, not the proverbial “bitch on wheels” like the one Joan Collins portrayed on Dynasty. The woman I speak of doesn’t give up her life to please a man. She doesn’t chase a man. She won’t let a man think he has 100% hold on her. She isn’t swept away by romantic fantasy.
The woman I speak of has an ever-so-subtle strength She knows what she wants. She is like a steel magnolia, flowery (feminine) on the outside and secure and durable on the inside. And she will step up for herself when a man steps over the line.
I believe men love freedom and need a mental challenge. Typically, most men won’t say things like “Don’t be a doormat” or “Don’t revolve your whole world around me,” or “Don’t always say yes yes,” even though, deep down, they tend to resent latched-on women who are unable to say no to them.
In my opinion, therefore — even though they may not know it or admit to themselves — men love bitches because they’re independent, they know what they want and they can think on their own.
To me, a bitch is an empowered woman who derives tremendous strength from not thinking someone else’s thoughts. To me, a bitch has come to a self-knowledge of her own value. To me, a bitch is a woman who has a feeling of confidence and carries this magnetic quality within herself always.
Because of that, she is able to relate to any male on a whole new level.
I am a bitch. Won’t you join me?