Calico Cat (Photo credit: Danielle Bauer)
Calico — You went away just like you appeared, out of no where, you walked into my life.
Calico cat you are so gentle, warm not taking sides, no separation, you were just who you were and never apologetic, you knew what you wanted , you knew who needed that love touch, walking through my front door of my home. Thank you Calico cat. As I lay your lifeless sweet body to rest you will always be in my heart for love sits on top of darkness and death. Your unconditional love was everywhere, my heart was ripe for your love to enter that day. You brought softness in the way I want to speak (soft with myself) and when confronted by others of different colors like a calico cat, to also be soft. You displayed all of your colors well, black white with maize in gods’ diversity. Loving, allowing yourself to be held in your last breathing moments cradled in my arms rocking ourselves in our rocking chair together, you were showing me to embrace life and death as we joined together in our sacred space, But death does not steal love. You are now cold and this mystery is: you still live warmly in my heart, you walked in to me and walked out. I am grateful for that walk my way. Love moves without an agenda. It just moves because that is its nature- to move. What you left I get it, it is all about life’ teaching, I get the big picture, your cats persistence taught me to receive love and healing no matter what form it comes in. Although your form is gone, placing you underneath my newly planted Bartlett pear tree, Mother Earth welcomes you, with help in growing her pears for our enjoyment .You have returned to where you came , thanks for making my home one of your stopping off places.
A glimpse of my truth is described beautifully in a poem by Kabir, “I will give back the pure soul that was given to me at the time of my birth as pure, as clean as it was given to me. I will give it back that way when I die.”
Remaining watchful, today I became aware of my childlike innocence as I entered into play with four children. We five children agreed to play Indians. One of the boys was 11 years of age and is gradually but systematically being programmed by everything and everyone. I noticed he kept his distance, so I selected him to be one of the Indian powwow leaders. He then entered into his innocent self. We all donned our Indian head-gear, gathered in a circle and appointed an Indian princess. We banged drums, played flutes, beat tambourines (I played my harmonica); we ate sunflower seeds, made peace signs and united in Indian calls with flourishing imagination. We were having big group fun on the safety of my front porch.
Just as conditioning and conforming creates a made-up identity, my spontaneous day led me to die to my made-up self and to once more become an innocent child with freedom to express the simplicity of being and to play and have fun. As I Corinthians 15:31 says … I die every day.
Three years ago, I was transported to the state of Arkansas to live in nature and the natural state. Last April, as I was driving through the early rush of Nature’s spring time with two other friends, a giant naked tree standing to my left caught my eye. It had enormous branches reaching out from the fat trunk and it seem to be pointing in every direction. In total silence, it was reaching out everywhere—around–up–down–side ways. This momentary glimpse opened me to my New World. In silence, I saw my self naked—open to everything.
I am here now–standing as that tree–naked within. I am standing unclothed in my 83 year-old body! No past to mock me, accuse me, teach me. I am free in this new world, hearing and feeling in silence. This is the new start that I have longed for–to be able to stand with no opposites or duality–no two, just ONE standing. In silence NAKED, letting it all hang out in total innocence, allowing myself to be possessed by Nature’s NAKED TREE. I can call it surrender, to a new space that I cannot control or a jumping off place. I can sprout green leaves to share without an agenda, letting others come and rest in leafy branches without trying to fix them; just being NOTHING–naked in love, arms reaching, embracing, being who I AM.